Oh the drama...I (don't) vant to be alone(as that vintage actress used to say)!
EDIT IN SATURDAY:
Made it to Idaho. Unpacking and setting up. I really did not focus on the regime, but I did not over indulge. Believe it or not, I have not found the scale...My daughter has it in her stuff somewhere.
I was asked to add some buddies to the diet. In May, the whole lot of us are going to lighten up. I am not sure if that is a companion diet or a make me in charge of cooking...lol. We are all living in a great big house. It is a 3 story and although it is 5 bedrooms, there are two living rooms and we all seem to fit. I have my own room. The girls share and the babies are in the masters. Oh yea babies! Twins at 1 and a half, my Zozo at near 2 and little man at 2.5 ish. Only one is potty trained. My little Zozo heck yah! It is a total of 7 kids. 4 babie/toddlers and 3 elementary school. There are enough adults to get r done though. We also have space. We will outgrow this when they get older soon enough, but the son in law says he will be rich soon...hmm.
So my eating has been what is and not abusing. I did have a couple of Frappe and a couple of sodas. The frappes I finished, but the sodas I think I want them, then I just pass it on to a willing child. I am not happy with bread and sandwiches...I think I will try a beer and then start getting on it by Monday.
I really want to get back into plan. I am really sorry that since August of 2010, I have been wishy washy. I am happy that I did not do major damage and regain. I am happy for the successful E2E challengers. Their success is very inspiring.
I am bloated. I feel bloated. Like I posted in my last post...yesterday I binged. Emo eating with a houseful of lack of manner recently adult guests...I did it to myself. We are talking chili dog chips cheese...chocolate milk..it was bad. So here it is:
My gut is back to where I was at the beginning of the challenge, but if you look at the sideview (arrrgh) I bubble out like I am all gassed up Either fricking way...there is no way I can look out of rose tinted glasses. OMG this is NOT what I was wanting to be at a year ago when I started. I had all theses expectations of a Christmas that had some poundage gone! Major reality check.
The good thing about this all is that I am no longer sick. And I got to get two books from Loretta (where I have always the most inspirational blog reads) that I can use as reference! One is a cook book! It is in the mail will most likely be waiting for me in Idaho!.Loretta is full of color and wisdom. She is apart from the wear black and hide behind the kids when taking photo kind of large woman on her journey! Her art is a window into what she is and feels. A beautiful and colorful soul. I really dig that about her! Check out her Art blog! Look for the elaborate art on her husband's motorcycle helmet. Truly impressive! I have her "2012 is my year" art badge on my sidebar.
What about my weight? Man I am just going to remember the last time I weighed and keep happy. I know we must take the bad with the good, but damn after the big bloaty belly pics...come on!!!
I weighed about a week and a half ago at the most. 246.6 Just before I got better. Now I need to step up and get ready for some sensational weight loss. How about it? And I need to stay away from all the drama that brings me into emo mode.
I am really sorry to have been so evasive this challenge. I really love my bloggy support. I need to be regular on the posting, but more so I do need to be regular with my subscription lists I follow. Once I get in motion, I think I will join another challenge...Maybe a slim to summer. I DO need to do the math and do the numbers and all. I hope to plan some charting and all!
Bloggie Love!
I say don't weigh in until you final E2E on Sat or Sunday. Give your body time to debloat. Weighing-in after a binge is depressing,a nd I don't blame you for skipping it. Some things are just...well...best given a bit of time. A few adys and bloat will ease.
ReplyDeleteIn four or five days of being back in control, you'll see the bloat whoosh off. Then, then...THEN...do step on the scale and make your fresh start.
It's your year, baby!
I agree with Mir... wait, catch your breath and re-focus. Hey, we ALL have had our mess ups on this journey. But we MUST learn to learn from it and let it go.
ReplyDeleteMy suggestion?? Do not look again at those bloat photos. Just don't. At least not until you feel the fire again. Program your brain with success, not your failures. Find a motivating photo for yourself, and feed that into your thinking. Honestly, the current research into brain science says that what we focus on and program into our thinking profoundly affects our thinking, emotions and ultimately our actions.
This is just a short rough patch. You've owned it. Now you can let it go and plan for success. And you are starting to do just that... already looking forward to a new challenge. :-)
Thank you for the kind words... I really appreciate that!
Loretta
Bluzey, do not apologize for having to be away. You are dealing with life, making some difficult decisions, and keeping your head above water.
ReplyDeleteI have enjoyed your sense of humor and am glad you caught up with us for the finale.
It sounds as if you are getting your game face back on and ready to pick up where you left off. That is important. Fall, get up, fall, get up. Don't ever stay down.
I will still be around to cheer you on!
Sincerely,
Jo
Me too Bluzey, I'll be here too. Life does get in the way and it's hard to refocus but you will and you can and you'll do what you must to get happy, healthy and in control.
ReplyDeleteHop back on the wagon and get your rear in gear and you will make this year your year. I have faith in you!!
Take care and have a blessed Easter.
Welcome back to Idaho! :) I hope you weigh in, even if it's late. It's an accountability thing. You are awesome! And if you keep at it, you'll get that after photo you want.
ReplyDeleteWe all come upon hard times and all we can do it push our way through them and get back to where we need to be to get healthy. I hope things calm down for ya & you can get back there soon:-)
ReplyDelete